


The Other Half of a Broken Moon

by nekolyssi



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: A whole lot of THINKING, Alternative Perspective, Anxiety, Canon Compliant, Character Development, Emotional Repression, Friendship, Gen, Poorly written volleyball matches, Saltishima in his natural habitat, Self-Doubt, Third Gym Antics, literally this boy spends eternity in his head sometimes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-30
Updated: 2017-04-19
Packaged: 2018-10-13 03:50:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10505805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nekolyssi/pseuds/nekolyssi
Summary: A glimpse into Tsukki's emotional, mental, and physical journey. Canon events and conversations will be used (and tweaked at times), to convey the story. I hope you will grow to love Tsukki as much as I do after reading this series!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The title of this fic is inspired by the song [Sakura Mitsutsuki by SPYAIR.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IcZRX8oc-8Q&index=7) It's a BEAUTIFUL song and I think reflects this story in a lot of ways. It will be referenced eventually so please give it a listen! :) 
> 
> View the cover art I made for this fic [here!](https://nekolyssi.tumblr.com/post/159019739739/nekolyssi-im-incredibly-terrified-excited-to)
> 
> (This is my first attempt at a fic bear with me<3)

Tsukishima Kei understands many things.

He understands the value of education and its necessity for securing a successful future. He understands that a good night’s rest and proper nutrition is crucial for the human body to function as needed. He understands technology, he understands math. He understands Japanese, and more English than most other students he knows. He understands many things because nearly everything seems to just _makes sense_ to him. Nearly, everything, at least.

What _doesn’t_ make sense to Kei is the overwhelmingly pathetic display currently occurring all around him.

Approximately 1 hour earlier, the Karasuno Volleyball Club lost their match against Aoba Johsai, effectively eliminating themselves from the long list of candidates hoping for a shot at the Inter-High Tournament.

Is Kei surprised? No, not in the least. Seijoh is far superior to them in nearly every feasible manner. For crying out loud, half of Karasuno’s team _just_ met 2 months ago. How can you expect a haphazardly strewn together team to be even _near_ the same level as a well-known powerhouse like Seijoh? Such ridiculous thinking sits near the top of the small list of things that _don’t_ make sense to him.

Is Kei disappointed? The answer remains a resounding no. You see, Kei lives his life under the motto of “You’ll never be disappointed if you go into the situation with a negative mindset.” Why even bother hoping for success just to wind up disappointed in the end? This might come as a shock to his ever-positive-thinking teammates, but life isn’t a feel-good movie about a bunch of underdogs that overcome all obstacles and achieve their dreams. Kei realized that years ago.

At first, Kei was surprisingly pleased by how everyone seemed to be taking the loss. The walk out of the gym was refreshingly quiet. No high-pitched shrieking from an unidentified but presumably red-headed source, no shouts from the captain in an attempt to control his hot-headed kouhai, not even a single word from Yamaguchi. This atmosphere lingered with them throughout the bus ride home, which Kei could only describe as silent frustration. Hinata kept his eyes in his lap, furiously picking at the skin around his nails in an attempt to keep himself busy, while Kageyama beside him kept his gaze locked on the window. Whether he was actually looking through it, or just…at it, Kei didn’t know or care. Tanaka and Nishinoya sat a row in front of them, with balled fists and pained expressions. Yamaguchi, beside him, looked like he could sleep for weeks.

Now, he sits begrudgingly along his exhausted teammates at a local hole-in-the-wall restaurant. Coach is treating them to dinner, an act of generosity that doesn’t seem very deserving considering the outcome of the match, but Kei _is_ hungry so… he won’t question it. At first, his teammates were slow to grab their food, as if even lifting their chopsticks was too much of a burden for their exhausted bodies. Gradually, their natural instincts kicked in and the room was soon filled with the sounds of dishes clanking, chopsticks scraping, mouths chewing, and noses sniffling.

 

Wait.

 

What?

 

Kei pauses his chewing and glances to the side. Yamaguchi’s eyes are fixed on the bowl in his hands and are unmistakably filled with tears. Beside him, Hinata and Kageyama are shoveling down their food with streams of snot and tears running down their faces. Not surprising, honestly. Kei almost makes a comment until he looks up and realizes that the first years are not the only ones completely falling apart. Both Nishinoya and Tanaka, (who on regular occasions would be boisterously shouting about revenge or giving moronic motivational sentiments), have been reduced to silence, choking back tears of their own. Probably the most shocking sight to see was the state of the third years before him. Asahi, Sugawara, and Daichi, whom Kei had previously thought to be the only members of the team other than himself that were rational human-beings, have completely lost control of their emotions as well.

 _How lame._ Kei thinks to himself, swallowing the chicken still sitting in his mouth.

It _doesn’t. make. sense_ . Why put yourself through this? Why even tell yourself that you have a shot at winning? Don’t they understand that the _hope_ they _fool themselves_ into feeling is the reason they are suffering like this right now?

Looking one last time around the table, taking in the pathetic state of his team, he re-makes the promise he made to himself years ago.

 

 _I will never,_ ever _let myself feel that way._

 

*** 

Evenings are always chilly in Japan, even in June. The cool breeze is refreshing as it grazes against Kei’s face and passes through his gentle curls. These are the moments that Kei can really appreciate. Simple moments free from any obligations or social interaction, with only the familiar sound of music filling his ears.

Kei has always enjoyed listening to music. Nowadays, you will rarely find him without his headphones on. He will only (reluctantly) remove them while he is in class, playing volleyball, or forced into some sort of conversation -- though sometimes he doesn’t bother taking them off, in hopes that whoever it is will _take the hint_.

When he is asked what kind of music he listens to (which is often, due to the constant presence of said headphones,) he simply shrugs and says “pretty much anything.” There is much truth to that statement, actually. He enjoys most of the rock bands currently popular in Japan, and even a few alternative bands from America, which have been a useful test of his understanding of English. He listens to classical while he studies, and EDM when he jogs. He honestly doesn’t care what he is listening to, as long as there is something to keep his brain occupied.

Without music, Kei thinks. And _thinks_ . Ordinarily, it seems like a perfectly normal habit…when applied correctly. Not only does Kei understand many things, he also analyzes and criticizes many things, (emphasis on _criticize)._ Once again, these skills come in handy in various situations and will no doubt prove very useful in future careers. However, this tendency becomes a bit troublesome when said criticism is directed at himself. Which, without an identified target for his brain to scrutinize instead, happens quite often.

 

_You’ve been on this same problem for 15 minutes, idiot._

_Why do you even try?_

_Disappointment. That’s all you are._

 

It goes on and on.

  
Kei takes a deep breath in through is nose, allowing the chill of the air to fill his lungs, and exhales slowly through his mouth. While his feet have been mindlessly walking the usual path home and his brain trying to stay focused on the music, he nearly forgot about Yamaguchi strolling along beside him. Although, at this point, Kei has come to expect Yamaguchi to be by his side at all times.

Yamaguchi has been a constant presence in Kei’s life since he practically forced himself into it back in elementary school. One minute he was thanking Kei for intimidating the bullies that had been relentlessly picking on him for weeks, and the next he was making regular appearances for dinner at the Tsukishima household after volleyball practice.

Several years have passed, but not much has changed. Yamaguchi is...familiar. Yamaguchi is comfortable.

Okay, maybe “forced” isn’t the correct word to describe how their deep-rooted friendship began. Rather, Kei let him in, which he doesn’t do very often.

And hasn’t done since.

Yamaguchi once told Kei that he felt lucky to be his friend. That it made him feel special because no one else got to really, _truly_ call themselves Kei’s friend. The notion still baffles him to this day. From an outside perspective, their friendship doesn’t quite make sense. In many ways, they are polar opposites.

Yamaguchi is...kind. He shows compassion for others and is very forgiving. He is optimistic and persistent, and does his best to make others happy. Truthfully, he is much more compatible with the loud-mouthed shrimp. Or Suga. Or literally _anyone_ else who would treat him with the same amount of loyalty and compassion as he does for others.

He is everything Kei is not.

_He will end up getting hurt._

Kei is not unkind per-say, but he definitely isn’t good at showing _kindness._ His cold-hearted attitude acts as a barrier for any feelings remotely close to compassion, and he finds most people to be quite irritating. He sees situations for what they are and nothing more, (which Yamaguchi calls being “pessimistic,” but Kei prefers the term “realistic”,) and pays no mind to others’ feelings when he speaks. (Maybe people wouldn’t be so bothered by his comments if they just stopped being offended so easily.)

Kei really doesn’t deserve a friend like Yamaguchi. He is reminded of this fact quite often, but it is even more apparent now. Because he is so perceptive, he can read others’ emotions with ease. This ability is part of the reason why he loves to provoke hot-headed people like Kageyama so much. Watching how _quickly_ he can get underneath someone’s skin is exceptionally amusing to him.

However, there is nothing amusing about how Yamaguchi is clearly feeling right now. He has been staring down at the ground while they have walked this entire time, eyebrows pinched together, chewing at his lip. He always does that when he is bothered by something.

So why hasn’t Kei said anything to him?

Well...what is he supposed to say? _“Are you okay?”_ He is obviously not okay. He has gathered that much through simple observation. “ _What’s wrong?”_ Again, Kei already _knows_ what’s wrong.

Yamaguchi was put in the match as a pinch server in a desperate attempt to reset the game’s momentum in Karasuno’s favor. Yamaguchi, whose _only_ goal since joining the team has been to contribute somehow to the team’s success, to prove that he could fight alongside everyone else, was finally given his chance to do so.

And he failed.

The moment Kei had seen the ball collide with the net and trickle excruciatingly slowly to the gym floor, he knew there would be no talking Yamaguchi out of the inevitable crushing guilt and embarrassment he is feeling right now, (not that he is any good at talking people out of negative feelings anyway.) Even when the other members on the court instinctively called out “Don’t mind, don’t mind,” (even the pompous King, the bastard), Kei didn’t bother. He knew it wouldn’t do any good anyway.

He can’t imagine that there would be anything he could say right now that would be any degree of helpful. He knows if he were the one in this situation, no half-hearted attempts at encouragement could mask the undeniably suffocating feeling of inadequacy. Except Kei would never feel that way, because he doesn’t care if they win or lose or if he does well or not, and it is for this exact reason. To prevent such needless suffering.

Even so, Yamaguchi is not Kei. Yamaguchi is Kei’s friend, so Kei should try to make him feel better.

He slides off his headphones and glances over at Yamaguchi, who has nearly chewed a hole through his lip.

_You seriously can’t think of anything to say to him?_

_If you’re so_ smart _how are you so terrible at such a basic act of human decency?_

Yamaguchi must have noticed Kei staring at him because he jumped a bit and reflexively reached up to touch his lip, fingers pulling away bloody. Kei watches as he quickly wipes his fingers on his jacket and sucks hard against his lip to clean it off, now looking even more frustrated with himself than before.

_You always just make everything worse._

An abrupt shiver shocks Kei’s body.

_He will realize that soon._

Furrowing his brow, Kei begins to open his mouth just as Yamaguchi makes an abrupt stop, fists clenched at his sides.

“I’m sorry,” Yamaguchi sputters.

For a moment Kei can only stare back at him with a blank expression. Yamaguchi’s entire body is tensed, with his mouth pulled in a thin, shaking line across his face. His eyes refuse to meet Kei’s.

“Why are you apologizing to me?” Kei responds, flatly.

“I….I couldn’t…” Yamaguchi’s voice breaks. “I _KNEW_ what I had to do. But my body just _couldn’t._ The team was counting on me and I let you all down and I’m _so_ -”

“Yamaguchi,” Kei lifts his hand in an attempt to stop him, not unkindly. Yamaguchi pauses mid-way through his apology and finally lifts his pained eyes to meet Kei’s. Normally a muddy brown, they appear slightly hazel in contrast to the redness that has slowly crept in as he fights back tears.

Kei has never been good with people crying, especially Yamaguchi, even though he has lost count of how many times he has cried in front of Kei. Thankfully, as the years have passed, the frequency of emotional release has decreased substantially.

“There is no point in beating yourself up about it now. Like Daichi-san said, just...make sure you do it next time.” Kei’s words come out a bit less sympathetic than he initially intended, which seems to be a normal occurrence for him, even when speaking to his friend.

Yamaguchi flinches at the memory, his body showing no sign of relaxation.

Eyes returning to their comfortable spot on the concrete, Yamaguchi all but whispers, “But what if I don’t?”

Kei pauses for a moment, then replies, “Then you don’t. Regardless, it really isn’t that big of a deal. It’s just _one_ point out of a single game for some club activity that will be meaningless later.”

Yamaguchi’s head shoots up instantly. Judging by the expression on his face, Kei might as well have slapped him.  

_Nice one, idiot._

“So you’re saying my serves are meaningless…?” Yamaguchi starts, face twisted around in a mix of anger and hurt.

Kei closes his eyes for a brief moment and sighs. “I didn’t mean _your_ _serves_ were meaningless. I meant that in the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t matter if you mess up or not because it’s just one point.”

Yamaguchi’s arms fly out in exasperation as he nearly _shouts_ , “That is so _easy_ for you to say! You’re a _starting player_ , Tsukki. It doesn’t _matter_ if you mess up once, twice, _or more_! You get to _stay on the court!”_ His arms fall to his sides as he lowers both his head and his voice. “I only have that one chance. If I screw up, I’m done. I have nothing to offer the team other than my serves, and I can’t even give you guys that when it really counts.”

For a moment Kei just stares out at the sky. The sun has fully set now, leaving their path lit only by the light of the street lamps above them. It’s colder now, too, apparent by the steady shaking coursing through Yamaguchi's body as he stands before him, waiting for some sort of a response.

Kei searches for words, but nothing comes.

Well, no _helpful_ words come.

The silence is suffocating. Kei’s fists clench at his sides, still _desperately_ trying to think of something he could say that might remedy the damage he has already caused to his friend. His _best friend._

_He deserves better than you._

Yamaguchi’s eyes slowly rise to meet his own. Eyes that normally greet his full of nothing but excitement, pride, or simply pure happiness, now appear so broken, with one explicit emotion written across them.

 

Disappointment.

 

Kei flinches. “I…”

“Don’t.” Yamaguchi half-heartedly waves his hand in the air. “It’s fine,” he says, voice defeated. He takes a sharp intake of breath to regain his composure and turns quickly on his heels. “I’m going to go see Shimada-san. I…” He hesitates, then sighs. “I’ll see you later, Tsukki.”

Kei watches as Yamaguchi carries himself away down the opposite path, shoulders hunched and hands cradled in his jacket for warmth.

 

_You are a worthless friend._

 

_Such a piece of--_

Kei forces his headphones back onto his head, cranks the volume up to an unsafe level, and continues home with pained eyes fixed to the ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Future chapters will be longer I SWEAR)
> 
> I need to take a quick moment to thank some very important people.  
> @majesticartax, without you this fic would not be happening. Thank you for pushing me out of my comfort zone, encouraging me, helping me in all the COUNTLESS ways that you have throughout this process, and for being (almost ;D) as enthusiastic about this fic as I am about Binding Problem. <3  
> @someonestolemyshoes, what would I do without you, honestly? There were days that I thought about giving up, but you pushed me to WRITE. You let me complain, whine, and listened to me when I had doubts, but you always made me feel like I could DO THIS. Thank you <3
> 
>  


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kei thinks too much and Yamaguchi is the friend none of us deserve.

_“Has anyone seen Yamaguchi?” Kei is frantic now. He has looked everywhere for him: their classroom, their usual meeting spot by the courtyard fountain, the club room, and now finally, the gym._

_The usual commotion taking place around the gym abruptly shifts as he stumbles in. Shoes squeak to a halt, volleyballs drop to the floor, and cold eyes slowly turn to Kei, like daggers piercing his flesh._

_“He left.”_

_It was Suga who spoke. Suga, possibly the most kind-hearted person Kei has met since attending Karasuno High School, is glaring at him with eyes like knives, adding to the sting of his words._

_“He...what?” Kei stutters, confused. His worried eyes scan the room quickly, searching for some sort of tangible proof that he simply misheard Suga, but he was nowhere to be found amongst the cluster of his teammates, slowly crowding around him like a pack of wild animals cornering their prey._

_“He quit the club, Tsukishima,” Daichi’s stern voice echoed against the gym’s walls. He stands in his usual demeanor, arms folded strongly against his chest, expression taught. Kei has never really been intimidated by his captain, but now, with the condemning gaze directed at him, he shivers._

_“He told us we are better off without him.”_

_“That he is useless to the team”_

_“He thinks it’s his fault we lost to Seijoh.”_

_The voices are all muddled together in a string of loud buzzing in his ears, and suddenly the room is spinning; Kei clutches at his chest for stability, vision clouded and dark, and for a moment he thinks his heart has completely stopped beating._

_“He…” Kei gasps, voice stolen by the sudden crushing weight in his chest hindering his breathing. But it doesn’t matter because he can’t find words. He can_ never _find words._

 _“Why didn’t you do anything, Tsukishima?” This time, the accusation rings clearly in his ears, spoken by the very_ last _person Kei wanted to hear from._

 

_Kageyama steps forward from the group, an accusatory...grin? plastered across his self-righteous face. Kei can feel the heat coursing through his body, still heavy and shaken with breathlessness. His lip twitches downward, and he hopes to god the King didn’t notice._

_“You’re his friend aren’t you?” Kageyama takes another step forward. Kei’s fists release from his chest and clench at his sides. “Surely you knew how he was feeling, and yet you did absolutely nothing for him.” Every biting word is a spark that lights a match._

_Burning. Kei is burning. Emotion, suppressed by pride, by fear. A slow gasoline leak engulfed by the matches thrown before him, setting his entire body aflame._

_“This is your fault,” Kageyama sneers, now mere inches away from Kei._

_Without permission, Kei's arm launches itself out at Kageyama, fist twisting into his collar with a jerk, but Kageyama is faster. His opposite elbow connects with the arm currently clawing into his uniform, sending it flying back down to Kei's side._

_Reflexively, Kei reaches down to cradle his arm, but is stopped by the tug of Kageyama's fists in_ his _shirt, this time. Kei goes to pull at his arms in a feeble attempt to free himself, but his limbs are like anchors hanging at his sides. He fights desperately against the weight but it’s no use, Kageyama is_ moving. _Within seconds, Kei feels his body jerk forward and is thrust back against the bulk of Kageyama's fists until he finally loses his balance. Kageyama uses the needed momentum to shove Kei forward, releasing his grip._

_And Kei is falling._

_All around him, his teammates stand, unmoving, completely unperturbed by the violence taking place before them. Their passivity speaks louder than any malicious words ever could. “You deserve this,” is written clearly across their apathetic faces._

_His body collides with the ground with a loud crack. Wincing, he props himself up on his elbows, but doesn't try to pull himself up. His body is too heavy, too weak. He doesn’t have an ounce of strength to move, and no one, not a single member of his team steps out to help him. He looks around at them, one by one, meeting eye after disgusted eye, and hangs his head in defeat._

_“Pathetic.”_

_Kageyama looms over him, his previous grin now worn like a trophy on his face._

_Except...something is wrong._

_Kageyama's eyes are not blue anymore, they're golden and rimmed with thin, black glasses._

_His hair is no longer a soft black with fringe to frame his face, but rather blonde with gentle curls._

_The one thing that remains the same is that condescending smirk._

 

Kei's body jolts forward with a loud gasp at the sudden ringing coming from his phone resting on the bedside table.

Groaning, he lays himself back down and removes his phone from the charger to shut off his alarm. Kei throws one arm over his eyes and the other against his chest, and takes a deep breath.

Kei hates mornings. They are, objectively, the worst part of the day.

It's not that Kei isn't a “morning person.” He isn't an afternoon person or an evening person either. And unlike most people he knows, he doesn't have a particular infatuation with his bed. He never snoozes his alarms, and will immediately get up to get going with his morning routine.

Kei hates mornings because it's when his brain is...weakest.

He has a theory that when you wake up in the mornings, your body is the first to wake but your mind remains half-asleep. In this mental state, your brain tends to believe whatever it was currently dreaming about is actually real and _runs with it._ It relies on pure emotional response and is nearly incapable of rational thought. Anxiety is at its peak, and is _extremely_ difficult to fight off.

It is the only time Kei is completely out of control of his emotions.

Mental images from his dream creep like a rolling fog back into his head. He rubs his eyes, _hard,_ half-wishing it would somehow help him erase it all from his memory.

It wasn't the first time he's had a nightmare, obviously, but it was the first time he’s ever had one that...vivid. Unpleasant dreams are a regular occurrence for Kei, if he does dream at all. Most days all he can do is hope that he will have another dreamless night so he can actually wake up feeling _rested_.

Kei slides his arm off of his face, rolling onto his side, and unlocks his phone to check for any new messages. Whether out of mindless curiosity or anxiousness, Kei isn't quite sure, but he subconsciously hopes to see something that will put his mind at ease.

_No Notifications._

He sighs, ignoring the sinking feeling in his chest and pulls himself up and out of bed.

 

***

 

Kei follows the familiar path to school, headphones sitting around his neck rather than over his ears.

An hour has passed since he awoke from his dream, but the crushing weight in his chest has not subsided.

How do you combat anxiety? With logic and reason, of course. Kei knows this. It's what he _does_.

He has weighed all of the options. Considered every scenario. But he can think of _no logical explanation_ for the validity of his dream. After all, it was _just a dream._ Kei has had dreams about dinosaurs wreaking havoc on his neighborhood on more than one occasion, but he knew _those_ dreams were completely ridiculous.

Could it be that Yamaguchi choosing to quit the team is an actual possibility?

_Yamaguchi would not actually quit the volleyball club, idiot. He loves volleyball. And he doesn’t just give up on things. There is no legitimate reason for him to even consider that._

He has repeated these words to himself at least 5 times since he started walking to school. They make sense. He has concrete evidence to support them.

So _why_ won't this feeling _go away_?

An image of Yamaguchi appears in the back of Kei’s mind. Shaking from the cold, pained eyes fixed on the ground in a desperate attempt to hold himself together, shoulders weighed down by humiliation and guilt. The mental picture blurs and fades into a different image: Yamaguchi’s back to him, walking away, shoulders still slumped, head still hanging down, getting smaller and smaller until he is out of sight.

Even more frustrated at himself, he huffs a sigh and slides his headphones on, shuffling the first playlist he finds.

 

***

 

Kei had gotten to school early and found his usual spot by the window. Even more-so than usual, he hoped to avoid any unnecessary social interaction, so he pulled out his textbook and pretended to skim over today's chapter. _Solving Linear Inequalities._ Ah, yes. Those are words.

As more students begin trickling in, Kei feels his heart quicken in pace. Placing a palm to his chest, he scowls to himself.

_Why? There is no reason for you to be feeling like this right now._

The seats around him are gradually taken, and murmured greetings and conversation slowly fill the classroom, but he keeps his eyes fixed on the book in front of him. _Inequalities that have the same solution are called equivalent. There are properties of inequalities as well as--_ Kei’s vision starts to blur. The blanket of exhaustion from his restless sleep still hangs over his eyes.

He removes his glasses with one hand and pinches at the bridge of his nose with the other, trying to stimulate blood flow. As he replaces his glasses, he catches a glimpse of a familiar piece of flyaway hair bob up and down two rows away from him.

His stomach does a flip. Or rather ties itself in a knot? Either way, the feeling is foreign and unpleasant.

 _See? He's here. He’s fine._ Kei tells himself.

_Is he, though?_

He slowly turns his head to the right, just inconspicuous enough for him to catch a quick glance at Yamaguchi who has taken a seat a few desks over.

He looks...normal? Kei narrows his eyes to focus them better. Yep, definitely normal. Maybe a little tired, but nothing out of the ordinary. Kei watches as Yamaguchi exchanges pleasantries with another student in his row, and the weight on his chest crushes down deeper, mocking him.

Kei quickly turns his head and redirects his gaze out the window and on the clouds moving steadily through the sky. It isn't very often that he observes Yamaguchi interacting with people that aren't him or their teammates on the court. Whenever he does, though, it serves as an unpleasant reminder that he is capable of functioning perfectly well without Kei. He could make other friends easily if he wanted to. Maybe he and that classmate have exchanged numbers. Maybe he texts him with questions about the homework. Maybe they will hang out after school one of these days.

_Maybe he will be able to actually say something helpful when it really matters._

Kei shakes his head and closes his eyes, trying to focus his attention on literally _anything_ else.

 

Morning class proves to be an excellent distraction. Kei finds most areas of academics interesting, ( _but he definitely has a sweet spot for math_ ) and is able to easily pour all of his focus on understanding the concepts at hand.

At the blare of the transition bell, Kei jumps a little. Students begin to rise from their seats, unpack their bentos, and congregate around the room. Without thinking, Kei gets up and heads straight down the hall toward the bathrooms.

_You're being completely pathetic, you know._

He stares flatly at his reflection in the mirror, searching for some sort of physical abnormality that may have occurred over night that has made him act so completely _ridiculous._

Unsurprisingly, he finds nothing. Just the usual reflection he tries to avoid when he can. The image that every monster in his dream seems to morph into in the end.

Clicking his tongue, he stuffs his hands in his pockets and regains his usual aura of apathy as he heads back to class.

Sliding the door open, he is met with bright, excited eyes.

"Tsukki!! Let's eat!!"

Yamaguchi stands behind his desk, hands flat on the surface surrounding his bento. Absolutely nothing in his voice gives way to any feelings of hurt or anger, just familiar enthusiasm.

Every ounce of the weight that had been slowly suffocating Kei since this morning dissolves almost immediately.

"Shut up, Yamaguchi," Kei retorts, walking past him to the back of the room where they eat their lunch every day.

"Sorry, Tsukki!! Tsukki!!" Yamaguchi stumbles after him excitedly, bento just barely caught between his fingers.

A reflex. A routine. Stupid banter that at some point might have held actual bite became an inside joke of sorts that they never seemed to let go.

Kei smirks to himself.

The two of them sit across from each other, enjoying their lunch in comfortable silence. This is one of Kei's favorite things about Yamaguchi. He never forces him into useless conversation. Yamaguchi has learned by now that Kei is not a fan of small-talk, (or talking in general...but there's really no avoiding that one) so he never forces that upon him. Kei knows that if Yamaguchi has something of real importance to say, he will say it, (and vice versa) but he never has to worry about dealing with needless chatter.

Silence allows for observation, which is what Kei does best. Currently, Yamaguchi seems conflicted by his sandwich. He has been staring down at it with a pinched expression for going on 2 minutes, chewing the same bite which probably can't even be considered food anymore.

"I didn't know a ham sandwich could be so offensive," Kei gives a small laugh, causing Yamaguchi to jolt back back into reality.

"S-sorry! I was just.. lost in thought I guess," Yamaguchi stammers, slightly embarrassed.

"Ah," is all Kei says. He knows if Yamaguchi's thoughts are actually worth sharing, he will. No point in asking just to receive an "Oh, nothing!" in return.

Kei starts picking around at the remaining rice in his bento for all of 2 seconds until Yamaguchi puffs out his chest to speak.

"Next time,” Yamaguchi starts, eyes filled with determination, “I will make it. I promise." He has a strange air of confidence about him, suddenly. There is not a quiver in his voice, no uncertainty in his eyes. He truly believes he will be able to succeed next time.

_Shimada-san clearly knew what he needed to hear. He didn't gain this confidence thanks to you._

Kei looks back down at his lunch and continues shuffling grains of rice around.

"I'm sure you will," he says, quiet enough so only Yamaguchi could hear. The words felt strange as they passed his lips. Slightly embarrassed by his attempt at encouragement, he clears his throat before glancing up to gauge Yamaguchi's reaction.

For a moment, Yamaguchi just stares, wide-eyed back at him. Quite an appropriate reaction, honestly. Surely he thought he had just been hearing things, but Kei’s expression must have confirmed it, considering he doesn’t often look...embarrassed?

A faint blush spreads like wild-fire across freckled cheeks as he smiles his giant, squinty-eyed, Yamaguchi-smile.

Kei simply nods his head in acknowledgment, grateful for the moment to have passed, and returns his attention back down to the small mountain of rice he subconsciously made in the corner of his bento.

"Do you want to stop by the gym after class today?" Yamaguchi asks.

Kei quirks his brows at the thought. "No."

"Tsukki!! I bet everyone will be there, we at least have to go look."

"You heard Coach, he gave us the day off. Why would anyone _want_ to do extra practice when we don't have to?" Kei puts his chin in his hand and leans against the table. There is an excessively long list of activities he would rather do instead of suffer through an optional practice.

Dive off a cliff without a parachute, for example. Maybe swim in a tank full of venomous Pterois? Truly, _anything_ sounds more appealing.

Yamaguchi sighs, a patient grin on his face. "I know, but I have a strange feeling that the rest of the team isn't going to take that offer...don't you think?"

Kei feels a familiar irritation creep through his body. Of _course_ the Freak Duo will be there. At this point they do literally _nothing_ but play volleyball. It's absolutely obnoxious.

"I really don't care what the rest of the team does," Kei deadpans.

The small smile on Yamaguchi's face falls away completely. He looks down at his hands, brows slightly pinched.

_There it is again. Disappointment._

"Well, okay--"

"Fine," Kei says curtly, wrapping up his bento, "I'll stop by the gym with you, but if they actually want to have practice, I'm leaving." He stands, just as the transition bell rings again.

The light in Yamaguchi's eyes returns almost instantaneously. "Okay!! I'll meet you by the fountain after class!!"

Kei waves a hand in response and heads out to his next class.

 

***

 

When he and Yamaguchi stopped by the gym, Kei was completely unsurprised to find the Freak Duo already there, accompanied by all five of the second years. He noticed the ball bin had been completely emptied, and the gym looked like a war broke out in which volleyballs were the only source of ammunition. He had absolutely no doubt who was to blame; they were still standing in the middle of the mess completely out of breath. Exactly _how_ or _why_ the gym ended up looking this way, Kei didn't even want to know.

"Oi! There's no way the third years are going to quit!" Tanaka half-yells to the group of second years.

Kei snaps out of his scrutiny of the gym immediately.

_Quit?_

Kei flinches at a hazy memory flooding his brain, a small bubble of anxiety peeking its way through his chest. He mentally shoves it away, scowling, and turns his attention to the too-loud Shrimp, now panicking pathetically to Kiyoko-san.

"The third years are staying right? They're still going to the Spring tournament, right?" Hinata's voice sounds utterly desperate.

Kei knew the answer before she even said a word. Of course they'd be staying. Kiyoko-san wouldn't be wasting her time here if they weren't. And, compared to their previous years, the Karasuno Volleyball Club as it stands now has the best chance of being even remotely successful, (as much as it pains Kei to admit.)

His presumptions were confirmed at the sound of hurried footsteps and staggered breathing entering the gym.

It was about this time that Kei mentally checked out. He isn't one for inspirational speeches or emotional team-bonding. He vaguely recalls Coach coming in at some point, completely shocked that they were all there ( _honestly? Are you even the least bit surprised?),_ and gathering them around to share the results of the Inter-High Finals. Kei was completely unfazed to learn about Shiratorizawa's victory over Seijoh. The gasps of surprise that came from several of his teammates baffled him. Shiratorizawa has been the undefeated champions of the Miyagi prefecture for _years._ Seijoh didn't stand a chance against them.

No one does.

Naturally, his ever-positive, overly-ambitious teammates somehow spun this news into an excuse for an impromptu motivational speech about making it to the Spring Tournament, and here we are now, practicing on a day they were _supposed_ to have off.

But Kei _definitely_ told Yamaguchi that he _wasn't_ going to practice with the rest of the team on their off-day, right? That was a thing that was said? Then someone please explain why they are on their _fourth_ set of an inter-squad scrimmage and Kei is actually on the court.

“Chance ball!”

Kei snaps his attention to the course of the ball. He locks eyes with Suga, a silent understanding passing between them as the ball starts to fall just above the setter’s hands. Kei takes a few steps back, shoes squeaking on the gym floor underneath him, and begins his approach.

On the other side of the net, Kageyama and Hinata brace themselves for the block. “It’s coming again!” Kageyama warns.

 _Good. Keep telling yourself that,_ Kei thinks to himself.

Arms swinging down for momentum, Kei launches himself off the ground into formation. Opposite of the net, the Freak Duo have timed their block perfectly to meet his spike. Kei swings his arm down to meet the ball, and pops it with his hand at the very last minute, sending it floating ever-so-gently in a steep arc just over his opponent’s finger tips.

Half a second too late, their captain dives in an attempt to save the ball. Kei shoots a glance down at Kageyama and Hinata, who stand frozen in shock for the umpeenth time that day, it seems.

“It’s pretty funny that you keep falling for that,” Kei taunts, Yamaguchi stifling a laugh behind him.

“What’d you say?!” Kageyama reers around, fuming.

Really, it is funny. Kei has pulled a feint against those two _at least_ 4 times over the course of these last few sets. It’s truly baffling that they haven’t come to expect it by now, which is exactly why it’s still such a useful move to use.

The match seems to go on for hours. Kei’s team _should_ be winning by a landslide right now. They’ve got Suga matched up with Asahi and Ennoshita, _and_ Nishinoya guarding their back line. So how it is that they’ve lost all but one of the sets they have played today?

“Hinata, get the last!” Tanaka shouts across the court, setting the ball up to the net after Kageyama nearly tore his chin off picking up Yamaguchi’s net-in serve.

But Hinata is too easy to read. His approach is text-book, and with the bump-set Tanaka gave him, there is only one possible outcome--

“We’re gonna stop it,” Asahi mutters beside him.

They jump, forming their arms into a wall just high enough over the net to compensate for Hinata’s height.

 _SLAM_.

The ball connects between both of their arms, sending it straight back down the opponent’s side.

 _You’re not unstoppable like everyone thinks you are, Shrimp._ Kei smirks in satisfaction for a moment, except...

Daichi was ready this time. He flings his body across the court at just the right angle, sending the ball flying back up to the rest of his team.

And Hinata is running.

It couldn’t have been more than 3 seconds. He had been _right_ there. _Right_ in front of Kei, but in a blink of an eye he had dashed like lightning across the court and was already sending the ball flying down the other side with a _crack._ The worst part was Kageyama was right there, waiting, completely ready for him. He knows what Hinata is capable of, and can act on it like it’s the most natural thing in the world. Like it’s to _be expected._

Kei grimaces to himself, turning to walk off the court just as Coach Ukai blows the match-end whistle.

White: 25. Red: 23. Match End: 3-1.

“One more set! Please!” Hinata calls out to their coach.

Kei stops dead in his tracks.

_You have GOT to be kidding me._

He turns around, expecting (hoping) to see the rest of his teammates waving off Hinata’s remark to finally call this impromptu practice finished, but all he sees are expectant eyes turned to their coach, waiting for permission.

Kei hopes Coach doesn’t look at him, because he _probably_ looks like he wants to murder the entire team right about now. It might not be particularly surprising, now that he thinks about it. Kei always looks perpetually irritated, so why not sprinkle in a little bit of homicidal tendencies?

“Fine, but we are _really_ calling it a day after this last set. Playing until you drop isn’t going to take you to nationals,” Coach amends, hiding a smile at the sounds of triumph echoing off the gym walls, coming from everyone but Kei.

 

***

 

Kei made himself pretty useless during the last set.

He was exhausted, hungry, thirsty, and in no more mood than usual to deal with the utterly obnoxious excitement somehow still exuding from half of his teammates.

“I swear to God, if Nishinoya spouts more crap about ‘Rolling Thunder’ one more time, I am walking out and never coming back,” Kei had mumbled to Yamaguchi in the middle of the match, not-so-secretly hoping he _would_ , just for an excuse to leave.

Every time Suga set to him, he wouldn’t even do a full approach. He’d take one step back, if that, and jump just high enough to be able to tip the ball over the net. It only took 3 or 4 times for Suga to catch the hint, albeit with quite the look of disappointment, and stop setting to him altogether.

He allowed his blocks to grow careless, even with his height as an advantage. He didn’t bother trying to read Kageyama’s tosses to Hinata anymore, because every time he tried the Shrimp would already _be there._ No point in putting in extra effort when it’ll go to waste anyway.

 _Finally_ , after garnering a 10 point lead, the Freak Duo’s team takes the match, securing their 4th victory that day.

Kei heads straight for his water bottle. His mouth had lost all semblance of moisture back in the 3rd set and has since begun to taste very unpleasantly salty.

“Kageyama, you can keep going right? Toss to me!” Across the court, Hinata is eagerly bouncing on his toes by Kageyama after resting for no longer than two minutes.

“‘Kay,” The King replies, following quickly after his partner, leaving Tanaka shouting from the gym floor in disbelief that they are actually going to keep practicing.

Kei rolls his eyes. Hard.

“Everything alright, Tsukki?” Yamaguchi asks, obvious concern on his face as he towels off the back of his neck. He had been shooting him worried glances throughout the entirety of the last set.

“I’ve told you before,” Kei deadpans, “guys that are intense for no reason piss me off.”

Yamaguchi gives a small laugh, to which Kei pauses mid-drink of his water bottle in confusion. “I _know_ that, Tsukki. I meant are you _feeling_ alright. You weren’t acting quite right in that last game.”

Kei finishes what was left of his water and shrugs. “I didn’t exactly want to be here. _You knew_ that, too,” Kei adds a bit too much venom to that last statement, earning a small wince from his friend. “And I’m tired. I don’t understand how you all can stand playing for so long.” He crouches down onto the floor and leans against the wall with closed eyes, welcoming the anticipated feeling of rest for his aching body.

“Well...” Yamaguchi slides himself down beside Kei, resting his arms on top of his knees, “it’s because it’s fun, isn’t it?” He eyes Kei’s reaction warily, clearly unsure whether or not that feeling is reciprocated.

Kei’s eyes remain closed, but his eyebrows lift in question. “You think losing is fun?”

“Well--uh, no...but,” Yamaguchi stammers.

“Exactly. Nothing about exhausting yourself just to inevitably lose is fun,” Kei opens his eyes just barely, catching a glimpse at Hinata spiking one of Kageyama’s tosses straight down the court line, and closes them again, scowling.

“Yeah, but,” Yamaguchi pauses, realizing Kei’s word-choice, “Hey! What do you mean by ‘inevitably?’ We won, too!”

Kei snaps his eyes open to look at Yamaguchi, “One set. We won one set out of _five.”_

“Well, we came really close to winning at least two of those,” Yamaguchi insists, making a feeble case compared to Kei’s reasoning, he knows. _Close doesn’t mean anything. A loss is a loss._ “I think our team did well. I bet in our next scrimmage we will definitely win more!”

_Always so optimistic.._

Kei snorts. “Right. Separate the Freaks first, then we’ll talk,” he quips, leaning his head back against the wall, eyes gazing out the window on the clear other side of the gym.

Yamaguchi pauses for a moment, clearly trying to find an honest solution. “Or...we will just have to get better than them!”

Kei actually laughs out loud, to his own surprise, and covers his mouth quickly to muffle himself. Just as he was about to inform Yamaguchi of the utter absurdity of his suggestion, Takeda-sensei careens wildly into the gym, catching his feet on the steps and falling face first onto the floor, some sort of paper still clutched in his hands.

Everyone immediately pauses their cool-downs, (or unnecessary ancillary practice), and crowds around the teacher, still lying flat on the floor.

“Sensei?!”

“Are you alright?” The voices of concern peel out of several mouths.

“He’s breathing, he’s fine,” Kei rationalizes under his breath.

As if on cue, Takeda-sensei’s head whips up, along with his body, (barely), shouting, “W-We’re going, right?”

“Where?” Hinata is the first to ask.

The teacher readjusts his glasses and holds up the paper in his hand. “Tokyo!”

A wave of gasps flood the room.

“Tokyo?” Hinata repeats, speculating, “So, that means…”

  
  
  
_Nekoma._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HUGE thank you to all of you that commented such lovely things on my first chapter and left kudos on this work. Seeing such positive feedback made me so insanely happy and motivated to keep writing this! <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kei should never become a teacher.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the delayed update! Work has been crazy...and will continue to be so forgive me if I'm a little slow for the next few chapters! ;_;  
> This chapter is very.....meh. I'm sorry about that! But, these moments are important to the storyline so *sigh* it is what it is.

_Nekoma_.

A team known for their incredibly solid receives and overwhelming flexibility in skill, they certainly live up to their feline-inspired name. For many years they had been considered Karasuno’s “fated rivals” due to the longstanding competition between their coaches, Ukai and Nekomata. However, when Coach Ukai was forced to retire, the connection quickly dissipated, and Coach Nekomata followed suit.

Kei isn’t sure if he believes in fate, but he does find it rather peculiar that Coach Nekomata made the decision to come out of retirement just as Ukai’s grandson appeared out of nowhere to coach for Karasuno. Whether these occurrences were a result of one another or not, it proved to be very convenient timing, obviously resulting in a certain Cats vs. Crows reunion.

Karasuno’s rivalry against Nekoma was nothing like their experience with Aoba Johsai, thankfully. Those matches were way too stressful. Whatever unresolved tension the King left behind with his previous teammates clearly carried over into high school, because it seemed as if members on both teams were making some desperate attempt to prove themselves. Not to mention their captain, the “Ringleader of All Things Unnecessarily Intense,” whom Kei quickly developed an overwhelming distaste for. His atrocious, cocky attitude is even worse than Kageyama’s, though he will _never_ admit that out loud.

At first, it appeared that their encounter with Nekoma would be one in the same, but that assumption could not have been more wrong. Naturally, first impressions were full of smack-talk and puffed-up chests; neither team willing to bow out of their aura of confidence, but by the end of three exhausting matches, both teams were _(loudly)_ inter-mingling and exchanging mutual praises.

 _Comradery._ That’s the word that comes to mind. Truth be told, Kei does not see the appeal. You are on different teams for a reason. Why would you want to be friends with someone you are trying to beat? The only logical explanation for getting involved with an opposing team is to observe and learn their strategies, but that certainly doesn’t require _friendship._

Kei made an attempt to stay as far away from the amalgamation of players as possible, completely uninterested in making any sort of “bonds” with the other team. He vaguely remembers someone trying to talk to him, though…

_Oh. Right._

Nekoma’s captain. The guy with the atrocious hairstyle that makes it looks like he just rolls out of bed each morning, looks in the mirror, and says, “Screw it, this works.”

After the matches against Nekoma, Kei stood on the sidelines observing as his teammates congregated with the other players. He was completely baffled by whatever Hinata and yet another hyper-active first year were attempting to communicate to one another. Whatever it was, it just sounded like a very shouty string of onomatopoeias.

_“What the heck are they talking about?” Kei grumbled to himself under his breath._

_“They don’t sound like they’re even in high school..._ ” Kei jumped slightly at the sound of the voice that appeared beside him.

Nekoma’s #1, their captain, sprung up out of nowhere like the true cat he is.

 _“You on the other hand_ ,” he paused, hooded eyes analyzing Kei’s frozen expression, _“you should loosen up a little, like a real high schooler._ ” The captain’s tone of voice was teasing, spoken with a noticeable smirk to match his intentions.

Kei felt a twinge of irritation flood his body, but made a point not to show it on his face.

 _He’s trying to get under your skin. Do_ not _let him._

 _“I’m not good at that sort of thing_ ,” Kei countered, breaking his gaze, and hastily walked off to help Yamaguchi carry one of the nets. He could be wrong, but he swore he heard the captain laugh something to himself as he walked away.

 

“A practice match?” Kageyama’s voice echoes, breaking Kei from his memory.

“Yes, and it won’t just be Nekoma this time around,” Takeda-sensei informs, clearly proud to have arranged this opportunity. “They call themselves the Fukurodani Academy Group. They are a group of schools from the Kanto region that hold practice matches together quite frequently, and thanks to a good word from Coach Nekomata, Karasuno has been invited to participate as well!”

_Sounds exhausting._

“Groups like these are created through solid relationships built up over time, so we need to make sure to thank Coach Nekomata for getting us an in. And Sensei, too, who I’m sure had to do a great deal of begging to make even _that_ happen,” Coach Ukai teases, grinning.

The gym roars with a collective “Thank you!” from the entire team, each member bowing before the teacher in gratitude.

“Now, now. Don’t get too excited. Tokyo’s pre-lims for Inter High start this weekend, so these away games won’t be until next month,” Takeda-sensei elaborates, expression suddenly growing serious. “There is...one more thing.”

The giddy atmosphere in the room dissolves quickly into apprehension. Takeda-sensei takes a deep breath, fixing his glasses, and addresses the team with every ounce of excitement removed from his voice.

“As you know, you have final exams next month, right?”

Kei struggles to hold back a laugh as he turns his attention straight to the four boys sitting to his left. Kageyama, Tanaka, Hinata, and Nishinoya each sit with their legs cradled beneath their arms, faces white as sheets.

“I think you know what I’m trying to say…” Takeda-sensei continues, warily. “But if you fail any subjects, you won’t be able to attend the away games.”

And all hell breaks loose.

Nishinoya and Tanaka leap to their feet, attempting a getaway through the nearest possible exit, only to be caught by a very speedy Ennoshita. Hinata seems to have lost all ability of comprehensible speech, muttering the words ‘fail... fail...’ over and over again while frozen in place. Best of all, Kageyama has apparently stopped functioning altogether.

“Kageyama isn’t breathing!” Yamaguchi shouts, panicked.

Meanwhile, Kei stands in the midst of the chaos, hands in his pockets, perfectly relaxed. Amused, even. Ennoshita has the stunned second years by the collar now, dragging them back into the confinements of the gym.

“M-maybe if we beg the vice principal,” Hinata sputters, body still half-petrified.

“Why don’t you just try really hard and... _not_ fail any exams?” Kei sneers, fully aware of the unlikelihood of _that_ happening.

There are some more feeble attempts at calming each individual idiot down before it all starts back up again and the gym walls are nearly shaking from the sheer volume of the commotion.

Kei laughs genuinely to himself. “Ah, the sounds of anguish.”

***

Today has quite possibly been the most exhausting day of Kei’s life.

That being said, the haunting visions from last night’s dream and the heavy weight of anxiety all seem like distant memories. Now, Kei can focus solely on preparing for his final exams in a few weeks, which should be no problem for him. None of his classes pose any real threat to him right now, and to be quite honest, he doesn’t particularly _hate_ studying. It proves to be a very useful outlet. A productive distraction.

Walking the usual path with Yamaguchi by his side, as always, Kei actually feels...relaxed? The top-quality entertainment provided by the bunch of test-flunking morons put him in a fairly decent mood.

“I’m actually surprised that Kageyama’s grades are so bad. He seems pretty smart,” Yamaguchi muses.

Kei’s eyes widen at the thought of Kageyama being considered “smart.” He may understand volleyball inside and out, but there’s not much more going on up inside that giant head of his.

“Hinata’s grades don’t surprise me at all, though,” Yamaguchi continues with a chuckle.

“I’m pretty sure all that’s in both of those morons’ heads is volleyball,” Kei reiterates out loud, smirking. The chances of at least _one_ of them failing an exam is pretty high. It’d be interesting to see how one would fair without the other at the away games. Or better yet, having _both_ of them gone? That’d be a dream. But if only one had to stay behind...he’d probably rather it be..

“TSUKSHIMAAAA!”

Kei and Yamaguchi jolt mid-step, stopping to whirl their bodies around at the source of the screech, though the sound was unmistakable.

 _Ugh. I’d_ definitely _choose to do without the Shrimp right about now._

“...-san,” Hinata squeaks out, face pinched together, gripping tightly onto his bike handles as if the suffix caused him physical pain to say.

“-San?” Kei quirks his brow.

“Help us study!...Please,” Hinata half-shouts, though the last word was nearly a whisper.

_You’ve got to be kidding me._

“What? No,” Kei answers without thinking twice.

Hinata seems to have expected this response. “Just, like, an hour each day. Or less! Or...tell us how to study?” His hand is raised, pleading, though he refuses to actually look Kei in the eye.

“I don’t think it would hurt to help out a few minutes before or after club,” Yamaguchi offers with an irritating, genuine smile.

 _Shut UP, Yamaguchi._ He thinks to himself, choosing better than to voice his usual remark, seeing as this time he _actually means_ _it_.

Kei rolls his eyes. Hinata is wearing a pretty pathetic expression on his face and Kageyama…

_  
Oh._

_This should be fun._

  
“Hey...you know, I don’t think it’s very fair that you’re having the Shrimp ask for the both of you,” Kei baits, already pleased by the very obvious reaction he is earning. “What do you have to say, huh, King?”

Kageyama’s entire body freezes up like he is trying to reign in a horrible monster from clawing its way out of his body. Maybe he is actually going into shock? A seizure is probably more accurate, considering his body is _actually_ shaking. Regardless, Kei is delighted.

“Kageyama...ask him!” Hinata demands under his breath, elbowing the stunned boy in the stomach.

Kageyama regains control of his body and mumbles to the bushes on the side of the road. It was nearly inaudible, but it sounded like something along the lines of “Please teach us.”

“What?” Kei asks, taking a step forward and holding a hand behind his ear for dramatic effect.

Kageyama’s knuckles are turning white at his sides. “Please..teach us how to study,” he mumbles, louder.

Kei takes a few more steps forward, keeping his desire to laugh at such a pitiful display at bay. “I don’t think I quite heard you…”

“TEACH US HOW TO STUDY, DAMN IT!” Kageyama shouts at the top of his lungs, flinging his entire body forward so hard his bookbag nearly flings off of himself, causing Kei to actually jump back with a yelp.

“SHUT THE HELL UP! YOU’RE DISTURBING THE NEIGHBORS!” A familiar voice hollers out of nowhere. Of course they had to time this interaction so perfectly to take place _right_ in front of Coach Ukai’s shop. They’ll probably have to do extra drills tomorrow.

The other three mutter their apologies, while Kei huffs to no one in particular, “Why am I getting yelled at…”

 

***

It turns out, to absolutely no one’s surprise, that the Idiot Duo is completely helpless.

The fact that Kei even agreed to tutor those two morons was much due to Yamaguchi’s relentless nagging about Kei being “ _the only one that can really help them_ ” and “ _the team’s only hope_.” Not that the sentiment actually meant anything to him, he just wanted Yamaguchi to _give it a rest_. More-so than anything, Kei knew it’d be more trouble for himself in the long run had he refused. If the airheads fail their tests and Coach finds out that Kei wouldn’t help them study despite their pathetic displays of desperation…

Yeah, no, thank you. As much as Kei loves to watch those two suffer from their own idiocy, the desire to avoid heated lectures is much higher on the totem pole of priorities.

Though, to be quite frank, the incessant, throbbing headaches caused by such close contact with utter stupidity are making the latter option seem much more appealing…

“If I am correct, which I definitely am, the agreement for this arrangement was only before or after club,” Kei offers flatly, not a hint of joking in his voice. It must have been Hinata’s genius idea to come bother him in between classes, because Kageyama very clearly has “ _I-told-you-this-wasn’t-going-to-work-Hinata-you-dumbass-I-HATE-THIS”_ written across his face.

“Yes, but, our English teacher was gone, so…” Hinata grumbles.

“Terribly sorry. Please return during business hours,” Kei replies completely unapologetically, returning his headphones to their rightful spot, and rests his chin on his hands, eyes closed.

Seconds later, Kei feels one side of his headphones lift off of his head and he nearly slaps away whoever’s hand _dared_ to pull such a stunt, but the nervous voice in his ear stops him.

“Tsukki…” Yamaguchi kneels beside his desk, expression caught somewhere between amused and worried. The idiots must have stormed out pretty quickly. “Don’t you feel even a little bit bad for them?”

“Absolutely not.” Kei removes his headphones completely, adding, “it’s their own fault they are so brainless. Maybe if they attempted to fill their heads with something _other_ than volleyball they’d actually be able to pass a simple exam.”

Yamaguchi laughs, rubbing his hand on the back of his head. “But that’s what they are trying to do...isn’t it?”

Kei scowls. If there’s nothing he hates more, it’s when someone manages to find fault in his thinking. It doesn’t happen often, but Yamaguchi is usually the one to catch him in a logical fallacy.

_Now who’s the idiot, hm? Good luck digging yourself out of that one._

“Well, they can find someone else to tutor them. They give me a headache,” Kei responds, visibly flustered. No point in even attempting to defend his previous argument. He knows Yamaguchi is right. The fact that they would resort to asking Kei for help is proof that they are capable of _some_ level of rational thinking. He just _really_ doesn’t want to deal with those two anymore.

Yamaguchi doesn’t respond to this. By now, he understands that Kei isn’t particularly agreeable in situations like this, _especially_ when his reasoning has been found to be faulty. But, that doesn’t mean he won’t try to think up of some sort of solution…

Yamaguchi gasps, eyes growing wide, startling the both of them in the process.

“What the hell?” Kei sputters.

“I uh….I was just thinking that um, the uh….n-new..”

“Spit it out, Tadashi, holy crap.” Kei manages to break a small smile.

“The new girl! The new...manager...maybe. D-didn’t she say she was in class 5?”

_Oh, that’s right._

Apparently, Kiyoko-san has been spending the last week in search of a new victim to take over management of the club next year. The fact that she found the tiniest, most skittish girl in the entire school for the job has got to be a cosmic joke. She should _run._ _Run_ and _never_ look back.

Yamaguchi’s face right now is _priceless._ It was obvious that he was smitten with the little blonde the moment he saw her, but the blush creeping onto his face at the mere mention of her existence is a dead giveaway.

Kei snickers behind his hand. “You remembered her class number but not her name, huh?”

Yamaguchi’s eyes widen in horror, hands fidgeting in his lap. His face is absolutely _on fire._

“Y-Yachi...was her name, I think,” he fumbles his words, feigning ignorance.

_You’re fooling literally no one._

“Yachi...?” Kei probes, smirk growing wider while Yamaguchi refuses to meet his scrutinizing gaze. He knows better than anyone that Kei can read people like a book.

“......Hitoka,” Yamaguchi whispers, freckles drowning in the redness on his cheeks.

“I’m impressed, Yamaguchi. You’re never so perceptive,” Kei teases, enjoying his friend’s misery a bit too much, probably. Yamaguchi’s hands fly up to his face to muffle the pathetic mewl that involuntarily escapes his lips.

All joking aside, this is probably one of the best ideas Yamaguchi has had in _awhile._

“If you are suggesting the nitwits torture _her_ with their idiocy instead, then by all means, make that happen. You could probably swindle yourself into helping too, somehow, even though your knowledge of English is on par with Hinata’s at this point,” Kei suggests, sliding his headphones back over his head.

He chose his words very carefully, and with just the right amount of bite to appear unassuming, which seemed to work out just as expected, given the fact that Yamaguchi is _leaping_ off of the ground and out the door shouting “You’re a genius, Tsukki!”

_It was technically your idea though…?_

Shrugging, Kei resumes his current playlist, a little too pleased to have this burden off his shoulders.

***

Exams arrived in the blink of an eye, but Kei was more than ready for them. For the past 3 weeks he spent much of his free time studying, welcoming the constant flow of information for his brain to process.

The majority of his study sessions were spent alongside Yamaguchi, given that they were in the same class. Yamaguchi would sprawl out on Kei’s bed, notebooks, index cards, and textbooks strewn about in no intelligent manner, sighing into one of the pillows every 10 minutes. Kei sat primarily at his desk, (which was perfectly organized, from the stacks of books and CDs to the array of dinosaur figures on the shelves) kicking his feet up every once in awhile until his butt fell asleep and he’d have to move down to the floor to stretch.

On more than one occasion, Yamaguchi tried making things semi-interesting by turning studying into some sort of competition. He foolishly bet Kei a strawberry shortcake that he knew more of the English vocabulary, and challenged him to a flash-card war ( _he had studied twice as hard to seem semi-helpful at the tutoring sessions with Yachi and the Pea-brains)._

The strawberry shortcake was delicious.

And, much to Yamaguchi’s disappointment, Kei even ended up scoring an entire 10 points higher than him on their English exam, ranking among the top scores in the whole class.

 _“It’s because you listen to all those Western bands!”_ Yamaguchi whined.

_“Whatever helps you sleep at night,” Kei shrugged._

This pattern was the same for all of their other exams. Both boys passed with flying colors, with Kei just a few points ahead of Yamaguchi each time.

Still…

   
_An 88? That’s it? How long did you study for, exactly?_

 _What a stupid mistake. Next time actually_ think _a little._

   
Well, at least he actually _passed._

Surprisingly, so did the loud-mouthed second years, though just barely. Both Nishinoya and Tanaka barely skated over the 40-point failing mark, but acted like they made a record-breaking achievement. Apparently, mediocrity is something to be celebrated these days. Completely ridiculous.

But, just as expected, Dumb and Dumber failed their exams.

Kageyama apparently failed modern literature because he focused all of his study time on memorizing kanji idioms and neglected comprehension practice. To be fair, the boy can barely understand basic human interactions, so how is he supposed to comprehend _literature._

Hinata failed English (what a shocker) but Kei supposes he deserves _some_ credit. He managed to get most of the answers correct, but ended up filling in his answer key one question off, earning him an atrocious score of 21. Such a brainless mistake completely nullifies any shred of respect Kei may have given him for his efforts.

Kei had thought he would feel very pleased by this outcome. He imagined how satisfying it would be to watch as Kageyama and Hinata completely crumble underneath their own failure, unable to participate in the _one activity_ that means everything to them, while the rest of the team carries on as normal without them _._

Except… it has not been satisfying at all _,_ just purely _irritating._

He can handle the freaks having obnoxiously unwavering resilience. They can try to twist their failure into motivation all they want. Sure, it’s annoying as hell, but it’s not much different than their usual behavior.

What bothers Kei the most is the fact that everyone has made _such a big deal_ out of it.

Various team members were tossing ideas around about how to help them study, who could help, how long they had to prepare them, etc. Tanaka was even helping devise a plan for them to somehow make it to Tokyo after their supplementary exams.

No. _NO._

They _failed._

They should _not_ get to go to Tokyo.

But _of course_ them not getting to go to the “amazing” Tokyo away games would be the absolute _end of the world_ for the team.

Yeah, right.

Every player on Karasuno has deceived themselves into thinking that the Freak Duo has become the unstoppable pillar of the team, and Kei _hates it_ because there is the smallest amount of truth to that.

He absolutely _hates it._

It would make no difference to Kei if the freaks never showed up to the away games, but he can already hear the excuses that would be thrown around after every inevitable loss.

 _“We just need Kageyama and Hinata here, then we’d be able to crush these guys for_ sure!”

_“You all just wait until the Spring Inter-High, we’ll have our secret weapon then!”_

So frustrating.

Now, standing in the middle of Sakanoshita Shop, Kei feels nothing but seething irritation as he watches the idiots fail yet _another_ practice exam.

He only stopped by out of sheer curiosity. After vowing to never torture himself with another tutoring session again, Kei remained blissfully ignorant to the status of their progress. However, Yamaguchi mentioned to him yesterday how beneficial their study sessions seemed to be so far, so Kei mainly wanted the satisfaction of knowing he was wrong.

And of course, he _was_ wrong.

Hinata lies face down on the table, arms drooping at his sides, while Kageyama beside him is slouched against his chair, head thrown back in defeat. Despite the half-hearted shouts of encouragement from Yachi and Ennoshita, the two look like they’ve just about given up.

This _should_ make Kei happy.

He got what he wanted, right? They failed, and at this rate, they probably won’t be able to pass their first supplementary exam to make it to Tokyo later that day.

Kei would normally rejoice at the thought of having a practice free of those two idiots.

But damn it, he _knows_.

He _knows_ the team needs them. He _knows_ the combination of Kageyama’s demanding tosses and Hinata’s freak jumping ability has given Karasuno an undeniably powerful weapon that _needs_ to be utilized.

He can deny it all he wants. He can barrage them with insults and poke fun at their weaknesses, but that won’t change what is obviously certain.

It sends a violent flood of irritation through every vein in Kei’s body to admit it, but Karasuno truly won’t stand a chance against the Tokyo teams without Hinata and Kageyama in their arsenal.

And at this point, it looks like their future is pretty bleak.

No amount of tutoring is going to suddenly turn those two into over-night geniuses. They don’t _work_ like that. They are exactly the type of people that are completely ruled by their emotions. Make one wrong comment and it can set them off on a never-ending spiral of pathetic dejection or relentless motivation.

Which...is exactly what they need right now.

A sort of kick-on-the-ass to get them motivated to actually pass. Especially considering the attempts at encouragement from Yachi don’t seem to be doing a thing.

Kei rolls his eyes at the sight, feeling Yamaguchi’s stare boring into the side of his face. He’s giving _that_ look. That very bothersome _knowing_ look. Kei scowls a bit, pretending to ignore him, and turns his attention back to the two idiots who might actually be dead at this point.

“There’s still another three days!” Nishinoya shouts. “You can do it!”

“That’s right! You can do it!” Yachi echoes, desperately trying to stay positive.

Ennoshita shrugs, pinching his fingers between his brows. “It’s useless. They’re completely broken.”

With one quick glance back to Yamaguchi, Kei sighs and steps forward.

_Damn it. Am I seriously doing this?_

“It’s disappointing, really.” He reaches down to grab the graded tests, pretending to examine them closely. “Here I was thinking of how well you could do, but this is it?”

The duo’s shoulders twitch. It was small, easily missed if you weren’t looking for it, but Kei knows he has their attention.

“If you’re stumped by such basic questions as these, you’re _definitely_ hopeless,” Kei laughs out the last few words, making sure the two can _hear_ the smile on his face.

Another twitch. This time _much_ more obvious.

So, Kei continues. “The answers are directly in the passages for Modern Literature. Surely a simpleton like _you_ could figure that out, King.”

Kageyama’s shoulders are visibly shaking, but his level of composure is quite surprising, given his tendency to snap at Kei’s comments almost immediately.

Kei glances over Hinata’s exam, the self-righteous tone still fresh on his tongue. “And isn’t English _just_ a language? Ah, well. I guess it’s impossible for a monkey, like you.”

Now, they both appear to be convulsing from their weak attempt at resistance.

Still smiling, Kei sets the exams back onto the desk before them, and turns toward the door.

“Well, it appears we will be having quite a satisfying Tokyo away game experience, considering we won’t have the obnoxious duo there with us,” Kei laughs, grabbing the door handle. “Well, I’ll be going now, have fun at your supplementary lessons, you two.”

He closes the door behind him with a click, the forced smile fading immediately from his lips. Just before he slides his headphones over his ears, he hears that all-too familiar roar of frustration-fueled motivation reverberate against the walls of the shop.

Kei clicks his tongue.

  
_Yeah. Don’t say I’ve never helped anyone_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NEXT. CHAPTER. WILL. BE. BETTER.  
> At long last.... TOKYO TRAINING CAMP!!!
> 
> GET HYPED ^^

**Author's Note:**

> Come scream with me about this fic/Haikyuu!! on my [tumblr! @nekolyssi](https://nekolyssi.tumblr.com/)  
> (pls I love attention)
> 
> Make sure to comment your thoughts! And thank you for leaving kudos! <33


End file.
